Coastal Caribbean Cartagena

27 de noviembre 2016

Bucaramanga, Santander, Colombia writing about Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia

I'm about 3 weeks late on this post, but it's busy down here this month.  We've had two  three-day weekends, our school sports teams were gone for a week for championships, and it's the rush to the end of the semester.

So let's rewind a bit.  On that first 3-day weekend (4 - 7 de noviembre 2016), I traveled to Cartagena with 10 other people (mostly coworkers, plus two extras).  Colleen, her friend Carla, Rosa, her sister Katalina, Dan, Néstor, Kate, Ryan, Andrea, Kelsey, and I packed into a gorgeous apartment we rented from AirBnB for the weekend.  

We flew Viva Colombia, which is like the Colombian version of Spirit Airlines - cheap if you go for the bare minimum.  You are only allowed to bring one personal item without paying extra - i.e. pack everything you need into your backpack.  You even had to pay extra if you didn't print your boarding pass ahead of time.  Turns out it wasn't even that cheap...my flight to Medellin the following weekend on Avianca was about the same price, and I was allowed to check in at the desk, bring my roll-aboard carry-on, and I got a juice box and a snack without having to pay!

4 de noviembre 2016

Bucaramanga, Santander, Colombia

So as I was packing stuffing everything into my backpack the night before the trip, my stomach started to feel weird.  I didn't think much about it and went to sleep.  I woke up the next morning feeling pretty bad, but I didn't want to miss work (1. Making sub plans is more work than going to work, 2. I didn't want to skip work and then go on vacation, that seemed like a weird thing to do, and 3. I hadn't printed my boarding pass yet).  So, I went to work and had to sub for Colleen's class as she had left the previous night to have an extra day in Cartagena with Carla (turns out she spent most of that "extra" time being stuck in Bogotá, but that's not my story to tell).  I was watching her class 2nd period, making semi-frequent trips to the bathroom where, TMI alert, I was shitting straight water, when suddenly I had to go again, and I ran out, but turns out this time I had to throw up...immediately.  In the bushes right in front of the classroom.  I could not control the liquids coming out of either end (though the barf was more solid...the mangoes and pineapple I had eaten the previous night had not been digested at all) so I went to the secretary, told her I needed to go home, wrote up some sub plans, and asked HR to send a doctor to my house (we get 5 home visits a year on our health insurance plan!).

So I went home and waited for the doctor, alternatively lying in bed in misery and laying waste to the toilet (luckily it's a short trip from my bed to my toilet) until the doctor showed up.  The school was unable to spare anyone to translate, so we communicated in a combination of broken Spanish and sign language (big shout-out to Google Translate). Turns out I had gastroenteritis.  The doc gave me a shot in the butt full of heavy-duty antibiotics, a long grocery list of prescriptions, and a promise that I'd be better in about two days.  I asked about the trip and she told me I should definitely still go.

A few hours more of lying in bed (feeling slightly better) and I decided I would go on the trip.  I knew I'd be mad if I got better quick and missed out, and worse comes to worse, I knew I could chill at our sweet rental apartment if I needed to.  I bought some Gatorade on my way out to refresh my electrolytes and got in the taxi.  

Now, a bit of a side note about the route from Floridablanca to the airport.  Bucaramanga's airport is situated on the top of a mountain.  Colombian cabs are small (picture a toy car), fragile (don't slam the door too hard), and manual (I have yet to see an automatic car in this country).  Not the best conditions for a sick stomach, but I made it all the way to the airport without being sick.  I did not make it all the way to the airport bathroom.  Luckily it was only Gatorade (unlike the lentils and rice that had come up undigested earlier in the day), and it was in the hallway to the bathroom, and there happened to be a janitor nearby finishing mopping up the bathroom.  Most of the Colombians nearby made noises of disgust, but a nice woman who was walking by asked me (in English) if I was okay and told me to come into the bathroom to clean myself up.  I cleaned myself up and joined my friends as we waited for our flight (which had been delayed two hours).  The security line was short, but I apparently had forgotten about my Swiss army knife in my backpack.  I didn't understand at first what they were saying to me, and then that same woman that asked if I was okay came by and translated for me before walking away (later found out she was on our same flight too!)

I made it through the whole flight (paying $4.000 COP for a bottle of water...) and the van ride through heavy traffic to our home for the weekend, where I opted to stay in and health-up as everyone else went out to explore the Cartagenian night-life.  As the sicky of the group, I was relegated to the bunk beds, as those were the only beds small enough to not warrant sharing.  This room was the smallest  and didn't have an attached bathroom (Dan said we were staying in the slave quarters; he was really excited about sleeping in a bunk bed though), but it was alright, since I had a bed to myself and didn't need to bother anyone or get anyone else sick.  

Turns out that same woman that I had embarrassed myself in front of had helped me twice earlier was staying in the same place as us!  As we were checking in, she and her companion came out of the elevator and she excitedly exclaimed to him, "That's her! That's the girl!"

5 de noviembre 2016

Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia

The next morning, we rented a private speedboat to explore the Caribbean islands.  I was a bit wary, but also didn't want to miss out and I was feeling a lot better than the previous day (still not 100% though), so I joined in.  I'm so glad I did.  I wasn't sick, and our captains drove a smooth boat.  It was a fantastically relaxing and fun time.  Everyone else was drinking and snacking, but I was happy to finally be able to keep down a couple of saltines.

The cool kids sit in the back of the boat.

Our first stop was a little bay to swim in, where we floated around on some noodles and splashed around.  There was a tienda on the tiniest island (literally the tienda was the size of the island) selling some beer for swimmers and boaters.  Canoes of vendors paddled by, selling hats, jewelry, beer, and fresh-caught lobster ceviche.  A couple people of our group got it and said it was pretty good.

Little island tienda

Our big salty pool

So many canoe vendors

Fresh ceviche, delivered straight to your boat!  The new Grubhub?

It passes the test!

After our little post-swim snack, we jetted off to our next destination - Playa Agua Azul on Isla Barú.  This tiny strip of beach was nice and chill, if filled with vendors selling everything from coconuts (with or without rum), fresh-caught seafood, bracelets, and massages (¿Masage mas tarde?).  We walked along the shore, in and out of the water, until we found a nice spot of sand to chill.  A few of our group rented a tube ride and whipped around behind a speedboat.  Kate and Ryan played catch with a coconut I found on the ground.  It was quite fun and relaxing.

We then all climbed back aboard our small vessel to head to Playa Blanca for some food.  Our captains parked right in front of a restaurant that they suggested we try, as it was owned by their boss.  I was so excited about the earlier success with the saltines that I ordered a portion of coconut rice, which was twice as delicious since it was the first real food I'd had (that stayed in my stomach anyway) in nearly 48 hours.  

Ever had seafood this fresh?

This guy was staring at me as I ate my rice.  Look at those teeth!

Look at this guy's antennae!  Yeesh.

While we were eating, vendors kept coming up to us offering cocadas (carried on their heads in typical Caribbean fashion), beaded jewelry, wraps/scarves/coverups (I bought one of these - negotiated her down to 20 mil!), and of course, ice cream.  After lunch, we explored a little bit, but Playa Blanca was mostly just restaurants and bars, but I got a couple cool pieces of coral (there was SO MUCH washed up on the beach there) before we headed back onto the boat to go home.

But first, lemme take a #selfie

Hello Cartagena!

Back on land, we all took a bit of a siesta before venturing back out for some dinner.  Kate and Ryan had found a good Thai/sushi place on Trip Advisor, so we headed over there to get some of the worldly food we miss out on in little ol' Bucaramanga. I had pad thai!  It was not at all spicy, which was probably for the best for me.  I was only able to eat a little bit before getting full, but still...accomplishment.  We had thought about going out more, but we were pretty pooped from our boat day, so we went back home to sleep.

6 de noviembre 2016

Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia

The next day I woke up and was basically back to normal (90%?) so I joined Kate, Ryan, Andrea, and Kelsey for brunch at a spot right near our apartment.  We then ambled around a bit, looking at all the colorful doors and buildings (this city is SO BEAUTIFUL - I highly suggest you visit) and the street vendors' artwork (I bought a painting!). 

The most colorful city I've ever seen!

So many beautiful doors.

This is supposedly the house where Love in the Time of Cholera takes place.

We found our way to the old city wall built by the Spaniards back in the day (Las Murallas De Cartagena) and wandered along the wall, circling the old city.  We had a lot of fun taking photos - a lot of them look like they belong in a Gap catalog.  Luckily we weren't the only goofs taking a thousand photos...we even saw a wedding shoot!

Totally belongs in a catalog.

Looking out into the future

Mad hops.

Partway over the bridge between reality and fantasy

Bombshell babes

After our jaunt along the wall, we headed indoors to the history museum - and you will definitely not expect what we learned about there.  We saw some pretty painful instruments of torture and learned a bunch about the Spanish Inquisition (I didn't even know it was in South America, for instance).  Pretty intense stuff!  It lasted 211 years, processed over 800 prisoners, and sentenced witchery, solicitation, bigamy, Judaism, Lutherans, and those who read forbidden (heretical) books.  The Court of the Holy Office of the Inquisition was established in Cartagena in 1610 - the third in America after Mexico and Lima.  This court sent 5 people to burn at the stake.  The museum is located in the palace of the court.

That does not look comfortable.

This one is placed around your boob and then squeezed.

Learning from the history teacher

After learning about all the death and destruction the Spaniards wreaked on the world, we headed upstairs to the rest of the museum.  The second floor had an art installation - Footprints of Memory - someone had taken pictures of shoe prints of hundreds of people who had disappeared in recent years due to the guerrilla warfare in Latin America.  It told their stories, occasionally including family members of the disappeared.  It was heartbreaking.

After composing ourselves, we continued upstairs to learn about the history of Cartagena itself.  The city used to be called Kalamary by the native Karib warriors, but the Spaniards named it Cartagena de Indias and the name stuck.  When the Europeans came over, they enslaved the natives and brought over African slaves as well.  Cartagena was a big port for trade, especially the slave trade.  All of these cultures melded into the Caribbean culture we see today in Cartagena.

After becoming thoroughly depressed by the museum, we needed something to lift our spirits, so we headed to (according to Ryan) Barack Obama's favorite gelato place (I can't remember if it's supposed to be his favorite in Cartagena, Colombia, South America, or the world) - Gelateria Paradiso.  I got a brioche (read: McDonald's hamburger bun) filled with Guanábana and Maracuyá gelato.  It was super tasty.

Brioche is a strong word.

It was damn good though!

We continued on our self(ie)-guided walking tour of Cartagena, stumbling upon a parade - "Tunas por la Paz de Colombia."  There were several troupes playing and singing, advocating for a peace with the FARC.  There was a handicapped boy in a wheelchair, and one troupe surrounded him and sang a private concert for him and the look on his face was pure unadulterated joy. (Have you ever thought about how adult is the main thing that is seen to "destroy" things, i.e. unadulterated joy...the joy hasn't reached adulthood and become jaded yet.  Something to think about.)

We finally got to our next destination - another Trip Advisor find from Ryan and Kate - The Beer Lovers.  Colombia's not really big on the craft beer scene.  A few of the big cities are getting into it, but Bucaramanga hasn't gotten there yet, so we've been a bit deprived.  The Beer Lovers had a HUGE  worldwide selection and a super knowledgeable staff.  Plus, we got a charcuterie plate, which was super tasty.

¡Salud!

We had some dinner at a bar called Alquimico.  I had a Bánh Mi con Pollo (only ate half of it, but hey, improvement!) and a Mint Lulep (a Lulo julep!).  It was a hipster bar (complete with mixologists), which is rare in Colombia.  Most of the bars around here play super-loud (not talkable-volume) Colombian music and have your choice of light domestic beers.  Alquimico had fancy mixed drinks and played chill tunes.  Very cool aesthetic too.  I recommend it to anyone who happens upon Cartagena.

We stopped home to freshen up and drop off leftovers, and then headed back out to the World Famous Café Havana to drink some rum and watch some live salsa.  We thought the $20.000 cover included two drinks, but turns out that's only on weekdays.  We ordered half a bottle of house rum at our tiny table and strained to see the band.  Kelsey and Andrea tried dancing in the aisle a bit.  My stomach was threatening me again, so I had some water and observed.

"WORLD FAMOUS!"

So crowded.

Just hangin' out with my friend Ron.

Salud once more!

Our entertainment for the evening.

After a set or two, we headed out.  I wasn't feeling great, so I headed home while all the healthy kids got to go out and have fun.  I had to negotiate for one of our three keys though - 11 people sharing 3 keys is a bit tough sometimes.  But I finally made it home and into my bed for a good night's sleep!

7 de noviembre 2016

Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia

The next morning, we woke up and packed up our stuff to leave with the portero - checkout was at 1pm and we had to leave for our flight around 3pm - and headed out for one last adventure in the city.  We found a little internet cafe where we could print our boarding passes and Dan, Néstor, Rosa, Katalina, Colleen, and I went to a delicious brunch place called Mila Vargas.  I got pancakes!  Colombian breakfast is usually soup, or scrambled eggs, but we got our fill of US brunch on this trip (I think there is a total of one place in Bucaramanga that serves semi-American brunch).

Damn.

We rolled ourselves out of the restaurant and onto the (rainy) streets of Cartagena, taking one last amble around the town.  We stopped at a couple of shops, getting some last minute souvenirs and gifts.  We made a quick stop at the little chocolate museum, ate and drank some samples, went upstairs to learn about the chocolate-making process, and bought a few tasty treats.

Rosa Maria the Cacao Farmer

Colleen and I wanted one last view of the ocean (gotta say goodbye before we head back to our mountains), so we left our group at a tienda with some beers and headed down to the wall to stare longingly into its depths and reflect upon our weekend in paradise.

Colleen looking out at the ocean she can never have

It was then time to head back and catch a taxi (or three) back to the airport.  Our time on the coast was at an end, and it was time to go back to work.

P.S. Guess who was sitting next to me on the return flight?  THAT WOMAN FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE TRIP!  Turns out she's from Singapore and is studying Spanish for a semester in Bucaramanga at one of the universities.  She was very nice.

2,562 Mile Romance

17 de octubre 2016

Floridablanca, Santander, Colombia

This past week was October Recess - a full 10 days sans students (with 2 professional development days interrupting the middle of the week) - and my fantastic boyfriend Noah came to visit!  He was supposed to arrive late Friday night (7 de octubre), so I stayed up past my bedtime (I've been going to bed recently around 9 or 10 pm...one of the fine benefits of having to be at school at 6:30 am) to wait for the taxi to pick him up from the airport.  I was sleepy yet excited!

However, it turns out he missed his connection in Bogotá (not an uncommon experience) and the next flight wasn't until 6 am the following morning.  So, after chatting with him (until his phone died... Bogotá has got to get some outlets!) and making sure he had a safe place to sleep and a ticket for the morning flight, I re-ordered the taxi and went to sleep for a few hours.

Thankfully, he and the luggage all made it safely the next morning (8 de octubre)!  The taxi drove me there, waited for us, and drove us back, all for $50,000 pesos (let me know if you want his number, he's very reliable)!

Made it safe and sound! We're both more than a little bit sleep-deprived, but so happy!

So we went back to my place, and after meeting Lulo La Gatita and giving her a good pet, we went to go have some Santanderean breakfast at Tony's Desayuno.  After some arepas, jugo for me/granizado for Noah, and huevos, we were ready... to nap.

Later in the afternoon, after a day of napping and otherwise chilling, we headed out to find Jesus.  Or is that Jesús?  In any case, we took a taxi out to El Santísimo, the tallest statue of Jesus in Colombia, and depending on whether or not you count the height of the base, possibly the tallest statue of Jesus in the world (yes, taller than Christ the Redeemer).  El Santísimo is 33 m tall, 37 if you count the base.  Christ the Redeemer is 30 m tall, 38 if you count the base.  (Noah doesn't think the base should count.)

We took the teleférico up the mountain  - Noah felt like we were entering Jurassic Park.

 Once we got there, we took our obligatory selfies and walked up the steps to see Giant Jesus up close and in the flesh - err...stone.  He's quite a sight to behold, I gotta say.  Though the sun was out when got there, night quickly fell like a bad powerpoint presentation.  There was no sunset.  Only darkness.

This guy?

I hope I'm not acting holier-than-thou.

So it turns out you can go up and see the world from Jesus's point of view, so we paid another $5,000 to take the Jesus-vators up 40 meters to get a better look at Bucaramanga (because being on the top of a mountain wasn't high enough).

Not the way to heaven.

Hey everybody!

We spent some time up there admiring the view and wondering what the antennae on Jesus's middle finger and head are for (I think they control different messages for different people), and watched as some teens tried to break their way onto the roof of the observation deck (seriously, aren't you high up enough already?!) before we made our way back down.

After our descent, we caught a light show projected onto a fountain, which was actually pretty cool!  They synced up the music with the movements of the water and the colors and the images and it was just fantastic!

Not my video, but the only videos I took were less than 10 second Snapchats.  

You'll just have to come see it for yourself!

We ate dinner at a restaurant with a clear view of the Holy Armpit, and got to watch the light show a second time while we ate.  We then made our way back down the teleférico and back home to get a good night's sleep.

9 de octubre

Floridablanca, Santander, Colombia

The next day, we decided to walk around Floridablanca, in an area I'd been meaning to explore but hadn't yet had the chance.  We stumbled into a dimly-lit small-aisled market, with people selling everything from candles to fruit to meat to tools.  One vendor had an entire pig skin hanging out to dry.  After holding our noses for a while (all that raw meat doesn't smell great), we walked back out and continued our explorations.  We eventually ended up finding the Botanical Gardens (Jardin Botánico Eloy Valenzuela).  I had heard great things, so we went in!

There were of course many beautiful plants, but perhaps the most exciting thing (to me) was the wildlife!  They had an aviary FULL of beautiful parrots, a pond full of ducks, and of course TURTLES wandering everywhere free-range.

WHAAAT. Check out this dude.

After the botanical gardens, we went in search of Obleas, a traditional Santandarean snack that is essentially a wafer sandwich.  Traditionally, obleas are just filled with arequipe, a caramelly-dulce-de-leche sort of thing.  I ordered the Amor a Mil, which is filled with arequipe, cheese, guanabana, and strawberries.  It was tasty but didn't stay together well, so I ended up eating most of the fillings with a spoon.  Noah got the Amor de Tres, which is filled with arequipe, cream, and pear.  He really enjoyed it.  We then stumbled upon a town square with a market going on, where many people tried to get us to buy more obleas, ice cream, bracelets, or photos.  We declined and headed on home, quite pooped from our adventures.

10 de octubre

Floridablanca, Santander, Colombia

Unfortuantely I had to go to work on Monday, but afterwards Noah and I had a bunch of people over for dinner (homemade tacos!) and board games (thanks for sending me stuff Mom and Dad!).  Everyone had a great time and really enjoyed the tacos.  We finally got some spicy in our system!  (Spice is not very common here.)  After eating and chatting and vying for the cat's affection, we played a couple rounds of Sushi Go Party and Cards Against Humanity, and (to my knowledge anyway) everyone had a grand ol' time.

11 de octubre

Floridablanca, Santander, Colombia

I had to go to work again on Tuesday, so Noah was left alone for much of the day once more.  Luckily, he became fast friends with Lulo and she enjoyed napping on him.  After work, Colombia was playing Uruguay, so Noah and I joined a few of the other teachers at a bar to watch the game.  We were told to meet at Saxo Pub (an Irish pub, I think), but it turns out Saxo was gone and Das Leben (a German pub) had taken its place.  So we were quite the worldly group I suppose.  It was a pretty exciting game, and the two teams ended up tying (empate).

12 de octubre

Bucaramanga, Santander, Colombia

On Wednesday, we decided to adventure to downtown Bucaramanga and see what there is to see.  We walked around El Centro and bought some fruit from the market, and dodged all the people that were jumping out to try to get us to buy whatever they were hawking.  We saw a guy blowing glass on the street and watched him make a swan, which was pretty cool (and only $5,000!).  

You don't see that every day.

We checked out the painted hormigas, and Noah had his first Colombian hotdog!  ...He wasn't impressed and it may have also been his last Colombian hotdog.  Luckily, we also found a place with empanadas and big ol' fried potato balls full of stuff (Papas Rellenas), so the night ended on a good note.

13 de octubre

Floridablanca, Santander, Colombia

Thursday was Noah's last full day in Colombia, so we spent it mostly eating empanadas and doing other very Colombian experiences - drinking fresh juice, buying coffee and aguardiente, and drinking water out of a bag.

Not as easy as I make it seem.

Many things here are served in bags - water, milk, ketchup, jelly, mayonnaise...you name it.  More environmentally friendly!  We also tried the Colombian soda Pony Malta, which it turns out is disgusting (to my students who may be reading this, Noah says Dr Pepper is WAY better.  I don't even like Dr Pepper and it's way better than Pony Malta).

We had gotten word that a chiva trip was in the works, so we headed back down to Bucaramanga with a bag full of beer to make Noah's last night a great one.  There were only 11 of us, but we still had a BLAST!

We're adorable.

Our chiva tour took us up to a discoteca near the top of a mountain with a great view of the city below us.  It being a Thursday night, we were essentially the only people there, short of one elderly couple quietly sipping their beers.  We lit up the empty dance floor and had a great time before re-embarking and partying 'til the cows came home.


14 de octubre
Palonegro International Airport, Lebrija, Santander, Colombia

We woke up before the sun to catch the taxi to the airport for Noah's early-morning flight.  He was able to get in one last empanada at the airport, though, being airport food, it wasn't the greatest.  We had a mild freak-out when the departures board turned from en sala (turns out that means it's boarding time!) to cerrado while we were eating, but luckily all was okay at Bucaramanga's tiny airport and Noah made it on the plane and safely through all his connections.

See How the Coffee Gets Made

18 de septiembre 2016
Hacienda el Roble, Mesa de los Santos, Santander, Colombia

Yeah, I know the famous quote actually refers to sausage and laws, but last weekend I toured a coffee farm, not a legislative building or a butcher shop (side note, for those of you who don't know, I actually DO know how the sausage gets made, and I've actually made that sausage with my family).

Last Sunday (11 de septiembre) I went on another adventure with the Caminantes de Santander to Ruta del Café Hacienda El Roble, Mesa de Los Santos.

For this trip, we got to sleep in a little bit and get on the bus around 6:30am.  After an hour or two, we got to the restaurant where we had breakfast (Only $4.000 for a full breakfast - eggs, arepa, and coffee!  That's approximately $1.33 USD.) and continued along our way to the Mirador del Chicamocha, where we took selfies, did a dynamic stretching warmup, and took a group picture.

What a view.

We then started walking up the road until we reached a dirt path leading into the trees - the start of the Ruta del Café.

The adventure begins.

We walked under the shade of the trees, chatting and admiring the view.  This walk was nice and easy - no rock walls to climb here!  It was nice and chill in the shade.  We soon came upon another beautiful lookout point, so of course we had to stop for more pictures.

Just admiring the view and contemplating my minuscule existence.

We continued walking without much to report.  Two hours of easy walking with beautiful views - in addition to the mountains and trees, we also got farms, a lake, and some really nice houses, not to mention all the various gorgeous flowers.  We talked about everything from our lives back home to the current political landscape of education.  But at long last, we made it to the Hacienda El Roble!

Hacienda literally translates to estate or plantation, but "plantation" in English has such terrible connotations.

Upon arrival, we were invited to tour the house on our own.  The hacienda is an old house with lots of cool stuff, including a library full of old books and a beautiful garden courtyard.  The house is also a hotel!  I'll let you see for yourself what else they've got.

After looking around a bit, we sat down on the veranda and had some time to relax.  They brought out snacks of mandarins, cookies, and the famous coffee.

Mandarins are like larger green oranges.  Or should I call them greens?

For the longest time, the best coffee in the world was this coffee from Indonesia that was made by harvesting the coffee beans pooped out by animals that ate the fruit.  A couple of years ago, the coffee from this region in Colombia (Mesa de los Santos) beat the poop coffee to become the best coffee in the world.

We snacked, we relaxed, we chatted, and then it was time to go out on our tour of the grounds (pun intended).  We set out to the Coffee Garden with Jack, the Caminantes mascot for the day, plus another dog or two that lived at the hacienda.  

Oh hey there Jack.  Jack is a 4-month-old golden lab that is owned by one of the Caminantes guides.

The Coffee Garden (not the Jardin del Café, why would you think it would be named in Spanish?)

Our tour guide teaching us about the coffee plants.

The tour was in Spanish, so I probably missed a few interesting tidbits, but I'll pass on what I learned.  I hope none of them got lost in translation.  This is the truth as I know it:

• Espresso has less caffeine than coffee.  Making espresso is a physical reaction because the water runs through the grounds very quickly, so less caffeine is produced.  Brewed coffee takes time for the water to run through, so a chemical reaction is allowed to occur, producing more caffeine.  The longer it sits the more caffeine is produced, so the first cup (at least for a pour-over) always has the least caffeine.
• They used to have only 1 type of coffee growing here, but they were required to plant a coffee tree for every sin they committed.  Now there's a whole BUNCH of coffee trees in many different varieties.

The fruit off the tree. 

Hey what's inside?

Oh look at that, it's the coffee beans!

• 1 gram of this specialty coffee can cost up to $100 USD.
• Overall coffee quality of the whole world ranks Guatemala first, Panama second, and Colombia third. However, at this small farm they have people harvesting the berries rather than a machine, so the people are able to harvest only the ripest red berries, whereas a machine would harvest them all.  This means smaller yields but better coffee.

Can you taste with all the colors of the coffee? (Dinosaur for scale.)

• After picking the berries, the next step is to "ferment" the coffee.  Through their experiments, they've discovered that coffee fermentation is best at exactly 18 hours.  19 hours and more leaves a weird over-mature aftertaste (like if you think about dating someone your parents' age).  Less than 18 hours and the micro-bacteria would not be removed.

The coffee fermentation basin.

• After fermentation, the next step is to dry the coffee.  The beans stay 9 days on each level; the bottom level is first, then level two, then the top level.  This is because the top level is the hottest.

The beans are on screens akin to the kind you'd sift for gold with.  Makes sense, since this coffee costs a pretty penny.

Our next stop was a presentation of what happens next to the beans, all the way to your glass.  We all packed into a little room where an old Colombian man told us his secrets.  First, the dried beans are thrown into a machine where they are deshelled.  The golden color you see is torn away, leaving a greenish-gray.  Next, the beans are sorted through and defects are removed (insect-ridden, diseased, etc).  For about 50 pounds of beans, perhaps 12 beans will be defective.  Next, the beans are roasted, gaining their traditional brown coffee color.  At this point, they can be packaged and ground at home or ground first and then packaged.  Grinding at home right before use is better, because with pre-ground coffee, every time you open the bag, the coffee loses more of its aroma, so by the time you reach the bottom of the bag you're drinking crap.

Coffee beans throughout the process.

Started from the bottom now we're here!

Once we got to the grounds stage, we moved into the room next door, where he had set up four different varieties of the coffee they make at this farm: Caturra, Nacional, Borbón, and Tipica.  He had grounds in glasses, and after telling us a little bit about them (in Spanish, so I am not sure of any descriptions here), he had us each come around and smell all the kinds.

This room smelled so good.

He then poured hot water into each one and talked about the chemical processes happening inside.  The first cup will always be the weakest, because the water and the grounds haven't been able to react and produce very much caffeine.  We were then each given a silver spoon (silver does not change the taste/smell of the coffee, where other materials might).  These spoons were used to break up the foam to release the smell so we could try the aroma.

Catando means to try, smell, taste

Next, we were each given a glass of warm water and a tiny "spitoon" (for lack of a better word).  Before we tasted any coffee and between each type, we were told to fully rinse our mouth with warm water.  After rinsing, we got a spoonful of coffee, ensuring that the coffee hits everywhere in the mouth to reach all the taste buds and get the full flavorful experience.  Our coffee instructor had this quick slurp-spit-rinse routine, but I decided that I didn't want to spit it out.  Why waste the best coffee in the world?  The slurping was fun though.  No quiet spoon-feeding for us....you gotta make the noise!  My favorite coffee we tried was the caturra.  It was very strong, but not as bitter as the others.

After we all had the chance to catan (no, not the board game) the coffee, we took another group photo and headed back to the hacienda for a bit before heading back to the bus.  We were settling in for the ride when we stopped again - we were given an hour to explore Mercado Campesino, an open-air market with lots of food, produce, souvenirs, and, unfortunately, flies.  

It was really cool to walk around and see all their wares though.

We were pretty hungry, so we decided to grab some grub.  Our group split off into a restaurant group and a street food group.  I love street food and wanted to explore.

Almost every other booth was selling arepas de chocolo con queso, with a little corn husk plate.  Saying this was amazing would be an understatement.

After a little snack of an arepa, a sausage, and some guanabana juice, we walked around and did some shopping, both actual and "window" (no windows in these little shacks, but you get the idea).

There was a booth selling medical marijuana, and another selling marijuana plants for your home.

Where am I again?

A picture of an American girl, wearing her new Colombian hat, drinking a German beer made in Colombia.

After walking around a bit and making some purchases (I got a new hat and some coffee whiskey liquor), we looked at our watches and noticed we were running low on time.  We climbed the pyramid-thing to get one last birds-eye view of the market.

Hey, I can see my friends from here! (They're the ones waving.  It's like Where's Waldo!)

We got back to the bus, where we made one more little stop to buy some of the delicious coffee we had tasted, and then it was homeward bound.  We got home around 6 pm, and I promptly fell asleep all the way until the next morning.