Bucaramanga, Santander, Colombia writing about Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia
I'm about 3 weeks late on this post, but it's busy down here this month. We've had two three-day weekends, our school sports teams were gone for a week for championships, and it's the rush to the end of the semester.
So let's rewind a bit. On that first 3-day weekend (4 - 7 de noviembre 2016), I traveled to Cartagena with 10 other people (mostly coworkers, plus two extras). Colleen, her friend Carla, Rosa, her sister Katalina, Dan, Néstor, Kate, Ryan, Andrea, Kelsey, and I packed into a gorgeous apartment we rented from AirBnB for the weekend.
We flew Viva Colombia, which is like the Colombian version of Spirit Airlines - cheap if you go for the bare minimum. You are only allowed to bring one personal item without paying extra - i.e. pack everything you need into your backpack. You even had to pay extra if you didn't print your boarding pass ahead of time. Turns out it wasn't even that cheap...my flight to Medellin the following weekend on Avianca was about the same price, and I was allowed to check in at the desk, bring my roll-aboard carry-on, and I got a juice box and a snack without having to pay!
4 de noviembre 2016
Bucaramanga, Santander, Colombia
So as I was packing stuffing everything into my backpack the night before the trip, my stomach started to feel weird. I didn't think much about it and went to sleep. I woke up the next morning feeling pretty bad, but I didn't want to miss work (1. Making sub plans is more work than going to work, 2. I didn't want to skip work and then go on vacation, that seemed like a weird thing to do, and 3. I hadn't printed my boarding pass yet). So, I went to work and had to sub for Colleen's class as she had left the previous night to have an extra day in Cartagena with Carla (turns out she spent most of that "extra" time being stuck in Bogotá, but that's not my story to tell). I was watching her class 2nd period, making semi-frequent trips to the bathroom where, TMI alert, I was shitting straight water, when suddenly I had to go again, and I ran out, but turns out this time I had to throw up...immediately. In the bushes right in front of the classroom. I could not control the liquids coming out of either end (though the barf was more solid...the mangoes and pineapple I had eaten the previous night had not been digested at all) so I went to the secretary, told her I needed to go home, wrote up some sub plans, and asked HR to send a doctor to my house (we get 5 home visits a year on our health insurance plan!).
So I went home and waited for the doctor, alternatively lying in bed in misery and laying waste to the toilet (luckily it's a short trip from my bed to my toilet) until the doctor showed up. The school was unable to spare anyone to translate, so we communicated in a combination of broken Spanish and sign language (big shout-out to Google Translate). Turns out I had gastroenteritis. The doc gave me a shot in the butt full of heavy-duty antibiotics, a long grocery list of prescriptions, and a promise that I'd be better in about two days. I asked about the trip and she told me I should definitely still go.
A few hours more of lying in bed (feeling slightly better) and I decided I would go on the trip. I knew I'd be mad if I got better quick and missed out, and worse comes to worse, I knew I could chill at our sweet rental apartment if I needed to. I bought some Gatorade on my way out to refresh my electrolytes and got in the taxi.
Now, a bit of a side note about the route from Floridablanca to the airport. Bucaramanga's airport is situated on the top of a mountain. Colombian cabs are small (picture a toy car), fragile (don't slam the door too hard), and manual (I have yet to see an automatic car in this country). Not the best conditions for a sick stomach, but I made it all the way to the airport without being sick. I did not make it all the way to the airport bathroom. Luckily it was only Gatorade (unlike the lentils and rice that had come up undigested earlier in the day), and it was in the hallway to the bathroom, and there happened to be a janitor nearby finishing mopping up the bathroom. Most of the Colombians nearby made noises of disgust, but a nice woman who was walking by asked me (in English) if I was okay and told me to come into the bathroom to clean myself up. I cleaned myself up and joined my friends as we waited for our flight (which had been delayed two hours). The security line was short, but I apparently had forgotten about my Swiss army knife in my backpack. I didn't understand at first what they were saying to me, and then that same woman that asked if I was okay came by and translated for me before walking away (later found out she was on our same flight too!)
I made it through the whole flight (paying $4.000 COP for a bottle of water...) and the van ride through heavy traffic to our home for the weekend, where I opted to stay in and health-up as everyone else went out to explore the Cartagenian night-life. As the sicky of the group, I was relegated to the bunk beds, as those were the only beds small enough to not warrant sharing. This room was the smallest and didn't have an attached bathroom (Dan said we were staying in the slave quarters; he was really excited about sleeping in a bunk bed though), but it was alright, since I had a bed to myself and didn't need to bother anyone or get anyone else sick.
Turns out that same woman that I had embarrassed myself in front of had helped me twice earlier was staying in the same place as us! As we were checking in, she and her companion came out of the elevator and she excitedly exclaimed to him, "That's her! That's the girl!"
5 de noviembre 2016
Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia
The next morning, we rented a private speedboat to explore the Caribbean islands. I was a bit wary, but also didn't want to miss out and I was feeling a lot better than the previous day (still not 100% though), so I joined in. I'm so glad I did. I wasn't sick, and our captains drove a smooth boat. It was a fantastically relaxing and fun time. Everyone else was drinking and snacking, but I was happy to finally be able to keep down a couple of saltines.
 |
| The cool kids sit in the back of the boat. |
Our first stop was a little bay to swim in, where we floated around on some noodles and splashed around. There was a tienda on the tiniest island (literally the tienda was the size of the island) selling some beer for swimmers and boaters. Canoes of vendors paddled by, selling hats, jewelry, beer, and fresh-caught lobster ceviche. A couple people of our group got it and said it was pretty good.
 |
| Little island tienda |
 |
| Our big salty pool |
 |
| So many canoe vendors |
 |
| Fresh ceviche, delivered straight to your boat! The new Grubhub? |
 |
| It passes the test! |
After our little post-swim snack, we jetted off to our next destination - Playa Agua Azul on Isla Barú. This tiny strip of beach was nice and chill, if filled with vendors selling everything from coconuts (with or without rum), fresh-caught seafood, bracelets, and massages (¿Masage mas tarde?). We walked along the shore, in and out of the water, until we found a nice spot of sand to chill. A few of our group rented a tube ride and whipped around behind a speedboat. Kate and Ryan played catch with a coconut I found on the ground. It was quite fun and relaxing.
We then all climbed back aboard our small vessel to head to Playa Blanca for some food. Our captains parked right in front of a restaurant that they suggested we try, as it was owned by their boss. I was so excited about the earlier success with the saltines that I ordered a portion of coconut rice, which was twice as delicious since it was the first real food I'd had (that stayed in my stomach anyway) in nearly 48 hours.
 |
| Ever had seafood this fresh? |
 |
| This guy was staring at me as I ate my rice. Look at those teeth! |
 |
| Look at this guy's antennae! Yeesh. |
 |
| But first, lemme take a #selfie |
 |
| Hello Cartagena! |
6 de noviembre 2016
Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia
The next day I woke up and was basically back to normal (90%?) so I joined Kate, Ryan, Andrea, and Kelsey for brunch at a spot right near our apartment. We then ambled around a bit, looking at all the colorful doors and buildings (this city is SO BEAUTIFUL - I highly suggest you visit) and the street vendors' artwork (I bought a painting!).
 |
| The most colorful city I've ever seen! |
 |
| So many beautiful doors. |
 |
| This is supposedly the house where Love in the Time of Cholera takes place. |
We found our way to the old city wall built by the Spaniards back in the day (Las Murallas De Cartagena) and wandered along the wall, circling the old city. We had a lot of fun taking photos - a lot of them look like they belong in a Gap catalog. Luckily we weren't the only goofs taking a thousand photos...we even saw a wedding shoot!
 |
| Totally belongs in a catalog. |
 |
| Looking out into the future |
 |
| Mad hops. |
 |
| Partway over the bridge between reality and fantasy |
 |
| Bombshell babes |
After our jaunt along the wall, we headed indoors to the history museum - and you will definitely not expect what we learned about there. We saw some pretty painful instruments of torture and learned a bunch about the Spanish Inquisition (I didn't even know it was in South America, for instance). Pretty intense stuff! It lasted 211 years, processed over 800 prisoners, and sentenced witchery, solicitation, bigamy, Judaism, Lutherans, and those who read forbidden (heretical) books. The Court of the Holy Office of the Inquisition was established in Cartagena in 1610 - the third in America after Mexico and Lima. This court sent 5 people to burn at the stake. The museum is located in the palace of the court.
 |
| That does not look comfortable. |
 |
| This one is placed around your boob and then squeezed. |
 |
| Learning from the history teacher |
After learning about all the death and destruction the Spaniards wreaked on the world, we headed upstairs to the rest of the museum. The second floor had an art installation - Footprints of Memory - someone had taken pictures of shoe prints of hundreds of people who had disappeared in recent years due to the guerrilla warfare in Latin America. It told their stories, occasionally including family members of the disappeared. It was heartbreaking.
After composing ourselves, we continued upstairs to learn about the history of Cartagena itself. The city used to be called Kalamary by the native Karib warriors, but the Spaniards named it Cartagena de Indias and the name stuck. When the Europeans came over, they enslaved the natives and brought over African slaves as well. Cartagena was a big port for trade, especially the slave trade. All of these cultures melded into the Caribbean culture we see today in Cartagena.
After becoming thoroughly depressed by the museum, we needed something to lift our spirits, so we headed to (according to Ryan) Barack Obama's favorite gelato place (I can't remember if it's supposed to be his favorite in Cartagena, Colombia, South America, or the world) - Gelateria Paradiso. I got a brioche (read: McDonald's hamburger bun) filled with Guanábana and Maracuyá gelato. It was super tasty.
 |
| Brioche is a strong word. |
 |
| It was damn good though! |
We continued on our self(ie)-guided walking tour of Cartagena, stumbling upon a parade - "Tunas por la Paz de Colombia." There were several troupes playing and singing, advocating for a peace with the FARC. There was a handicapped boy in a wheelchair, and one troupe surrounded him and sang a private concert for him and the look on his face was pure unadulterated joy. (Have you ever thought about how adult is the main thing that is seen to "destroy" things, i.e. unadulterated joy...the joy hasn't reached adulthood and become jaded yet. Something to think about.)
We finally got to our next destination - another Trip Advisor find from Ryan and Kate - The Beer Lovers. Colombia's not really big on the craft beer scene. A few of the big cities are getting into it, but Bucaramanga hasn't gotten there yet, so we've been a bit deprived. The Beer Lovers had a HUGE worldwide selection and a super knowledgeable staff. Plus, we got a charcuterie plate, which was super tasty.
 |
| ¡Salud! |
We had some dinner at a bar called Alquimico. I had a Bánh Mi con Pollo (only ate half of it, but hey, improvement!) and a Mint Lulep (a Lulo julep!). It was a hipster bar (complete with mixologists), which is rare in Colombia. Most of the bars around here play super-loud (not talkable-volume) Colombian music and have your choice of light domestic beers. Alquimico had fancy mixed drinks and played chill tunes. Very cool aesthetic too. I recommend it to anyone who happens upon Cartagena.
We stopped home to freshen up and drop off leftovers, and then headed back out to the World Famous Café Havana to drink some rum and watch some live salsa. We thought the $20.000 cover included two drinks, but turns out that's only on weekdays. We ordered half a bottle of house rum at our tiny table and strained to see the band. Kelsey and Andrea tried dancing in the aisle a bit. My stomach was threatening me again, so I had some water and observed.
 |
| "WORLD FAMOUS!" |
 |
| So crowded. |
 |
| Just hangin' out with my friend Ron. |
 |
| Salud once more! |
 |
| Our entertainment for the evening. |
After a set or two, we headed out. I wasn't feeling great, so I headed home while all the healthy kids got to go out and have fun. I had to negotiate for one of our three keys though - 11 people sharing 3 keys is a bit tough sometimes. But I finally made it home and into my bed for a good night's sleep!
7 de noviembre 2016
Cartagena de Indias, Bolívar, Colombia
The next morning, we woke up and packed up our stuff to leave with the portero - checkout was at 1pm and we had to leave for our flight around 3pm - and headed out for one last adventure in the city. We found a little internet cafe where we could print our boarding passes and Dan, Néstor, Rosa, Katalina, Colleen, and I went to a delicious brunch place called Mila Vargas. I got pancakes! Colombian breakfast is usually soup, or scrambled eggs, but we got our fill of US brunch on this trip (I think there is a total of one place in Bucaramanga that serves semi-American brunch).
 |
| Damn. |
 |
| Rosa Maria the Cacao Farmer |
Colleen and I wanted one last view of the ocean (gotta say goodbye before we head back to our mountains), so we left our group at a tienda with some beers and headed down to the wall to stare longingly into its depths and reflect upon our weekend in paradise.
 |
| Colleen looking out at the ocean she can never have |
It was then time to head back and catch a taxi (or three) back to the airport. Our time on the coast was at an end, and it was time to go back to work.
P.S. Guess who was sitting next to me on the return flight? THAT WOMAN FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE TRIP! Turns out she's from Singapore and is studying Spanish for a semester in Bucaramanga at one of the universities. She was very nice.
P.S. Guess who was sitting next to me on the return flight? THAT WOMAN FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE TRIP! Turns out she's from Singapore and is studying Spanish for a semester in Bucaramanga at one of the universities. She was very nice.
